Author: Melissa Gould
1. Well first off congratulations on the release and success of “Widowish”! What made you want to write this book and where did the inspiration come from?
Thanks so much~ I decided to write Widowish, A Memoir as a way to keep my late husband’s memory alive. Also as a record of our life and love together, his unexpected death, and how our daughter and I coped in that first year after losing him.
I didn’t realize it at first, but writing about this traumatic event is really the most healing thing I have done for myself. The fact that people find my story resonant and find Widowish to be helpful to them in some way has been the greatest gift.
2. What is one piece of advice you would give someone that is currently going through a loss of a loved one?
My advice to anyone who is grieving is to be kind to yourself. You’re doing the best you can and there’s no right or wrong way to grieve. Grief hits at unexpected times and in unpredictable ways. Acknowledge it and feel it, there’s no getting around it, you just have to go through it - as hard as that is, and however long it takes - to get to the other side.
I have also found time to be a miraculous healer. That’s hard to imagine in the early days, when your loss is new, but really, time helps tremendously.
3. The world has experienced much loss this past year due to COVID-19. Even though the virus is still present, how can the world begin to collectively grief?
I think that with COVID, grief has become more ubiquitous and not quite as mysterious as it was before. It’s affected so many people that we’re seeing what grief looks like from every angle, unfortunately. The order of loss is messed up - we see parents losing their children, siblings losing a sibling, husband’s losing their wives - it’s tragic!
Grief has certainly been part of a larger conversation which is probably healthy. Grief is something that everyone experiences and for better or worse, because of COVID, it has perhaps been a bit more normalized.
4. What do you hope readers take away from this book?
In Widowish, I hope that readers get to know my husband and see that we shared a life together that was full of love and hope, even when he was so sick. Widowish is ultimately a love story and the more people who read it, get to know my husband. That keeps him close… which is everything!
I also want readers, specifically those affected by loss, to know that grief is survivable. It’s painful, excruciating at times, but somehow we all miraculously get through it. You don’t know that in the beginning but it’s true.
5. What’s an adventure that you took with your husband, that you look back on fondly today?
In Widiowish, I write about our family trip to Europe - Spain, Italy, France and England. I’m so glad we did that! It created memories for all of us, but especially for our daughter. It was a wonderful adventure from start to finish, even if my husband wasn’t always feeling his best everyday.
6. What’s your best advice for getting over writer’s block?
For me, the best way to get over writer’s block is to just keep writing. Or start writing. Even if it’s bad and makes no sense or you can’t even find the story! Just write, or keep writing. I think it’s easier to edit than to start from scratch. Once something is on the page, you at least have something to work with.
7. What’s the best book you have read this year so far?
I love everything written by Curtis Sittenfeld and her latest book, “Rodham” was one of my faves from last year. She seamlessly weaved together what we knew about the protagonist and what might have been. It was a flawless read, as is everything she writes!
8. Do you plan on writing more books in the future?
I will absolutely keep writing! I’m not sure what’s next but I have ideas for a novel, and a YA book, maybe even another memoir. Right now I’m enjoying the success of Widowish and I’m thankful I have a chance to breathe before deciding on my next project. Stay tuned!
Places To Find More From This Author:
Facebook: Melissa Gould
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